


Killer

by youaremytotino



Category: The Last of Us (Video Games)
Genre: Best Friends, Cute & Gay, Dina is in her bi feelings, F/F, Inspired by Music, One Shot, Useless Lesbians, that wanna kiss maybe!?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-27
Updated: 2020-11-27
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:21:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27716035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/youaremytotino/pseuds/youaremytotino
Summary: Dina finds the perfect gift for Ellie’s birthday, but it ends up revealing more to her than she expected about their relationship and how she really feels about her best friend.
Relationships: Dina & Ellie (The Last of Us), Dina/Ellie (The Last of Us)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 57





	Killer

**Author's Note:**

> Just a cute thing inspired by the song “Killer” by Palehound. If you’ve never heard of Palehound before, I definitely recommend her! She’s an amazing queer artist that needs more recognition and love! Anyway, this song really reminds me of these characters for some reason, so here’s a little one shot. This is my first time posting, I’m nervous about it but my fiancé encouraged me and I’ve had a good amount of wine tonight, so let’s go lol :,) Thanks for reading!

She’d found the CD tucked away behind a divider card that said “Queer Artists - Singles.” The cover photo had intrigued her, some weird crocheted masked-monster sucking on a straw. An artist called Palehound - _whatever the fuck that is_ \- and the song, “Killer.” _Ha, sounds about right. Perfect.  
_

With Ellie’s birthday around the corner, Dina figured why not gift the gayest person in Jackson with some gay music? Maybe it was all a little on the nose, but it was a step up from a paper crown. Sure, Ellie had loved that thing, but Dina wanted to get her something a little better for her 19th. No real reason why, though Ellie was getting really good at guitar so maybe this song would be one worth learning? Then she could play it and sing it in her own voice. For Dina or something. _Whatever. Shut up brain._

She had stumbled upon this old music store on one of her patrols with Eugene a few months before he passed. Surprisingly it’d stayed fairly intact, with just a few infected in the surrounding area they easily knocked out that day. She and Eugene had spent some time rummaging through, when Dina noticed a rainbow flag hanging on a wall above a selection of music labeled LGBTQIA. Completely confused, Dina had asked Eugene what both the flag and LGBTQIA meant, and he’d laughed and said, “For gay folks, like your friend Ellie.” She remembered thinking, _And maybe me?,_ which scared the shit out of her.

So a few days before the big day, she’d awkwardly asked her new patrol partner to take a detour back to look around some more. Her partner of course just _had_ to be Jesse. They’d recently broken up - again - but Dina was determined it’d be the last time. They’d run their course. It was time they both moved on and set their sights on someone else. _**Something** else! Other things. Fuck._

They were still pretty stiff around each other since the break, so luckily Jesse didn’t ask too many questions while she looked for Ellie’s gift. Did the dumbass even realize it was Ellie’s birthday soon? _Men._ Anyway, this CD seemed like the move. She grinned, carefully tucked it into her bag and signaled to Jesse she was ready to move on.

Back at Jackson later that evening, she ran off to her house after settling Japan in at the stables without saying goodbye to Jesse. _I should probably not be such an asshole... eh. File away for another day_.

She flew through the door and up the stairs straight into her room, pulling out her old walkman. She needed to test the merchandise, afterall. _Don’t wanna give her something that’s complete shit_. Laying on her bed, she clicked the disc in, closed the case and pressed play. The song started, guitar filtering through the worn headphones covering her ears.

_**With every step he takes** _

_**An evil shakes in you** _

_**He's hauling ass** _

_**Feet slapping down your avenue** _

Pretty good so far. The guitar reminded her of the stuff she’d heard in those old western movies she’d happily sat through with Ellie and Joel. And the singer had a low, raspy voice that sort of reminded her of Ellie’s singing voice, the bits she’d heard here and there, anyway. Wow, for a blind guess it felt like a solid song Ellie might genuinely like.

_**Fingers tracing the spaces** _

_**Between the bricks lining your hall** _

_**My weapon's slick in my hands** _

_**My back's against your wall** _

She closed her eyes and pictured Ellie, thinking she’d like to try and imagine her face when she received the gift. Instead, she just got distracted by said face. All of those freckles that scattered across her cheeks like constellations, her deep green eyes, that stupid perfectly placed scar that cut through her right eyebrow. So infuriatingly cute.

_Again brain, what the fuck?_

**_I wanna be the one who kills the man who hurt you, darling_ **

**_I wanna be the one who kills the man who hurt you, darling_ **

A chill ran through her at that line. Whoa, why did she suddenly feel like she wanted to bawl her eyes out?

She and Ellie had been best friends for years and Dina had always been drawn to her for some reason or other from the very beginning. What started as innocent friendly interactions grew into this overwhelming infatuation, an almost constant need to be around her. To protect her somehow, Dina reasoned, even if Ellie didn’t particularly need protecting. Dina always wanted to be a source of comfort. Maybe _the_ source? She’d certainly been a huge bitch to Cat while she and Ellie dated for this exact reason. But, that’s just what it’s like to be someone’s best friend, right? You love them and want what’s best for them. And maybe you want to have their attention in more significant ways than anyone else gets to have it...right?

_Right?_

_**Just because I feel the devil in your bed** _

_**Don't mean it's you** _

_**When you winced and turned your head** _

_**And wept, that's when I knew** _

She clenched her jaw at the overpowering thoughts and tried to settle her mind back on the song. But then the lyrics mentioned a bed and _here we go again_. She thought about all of their sleepovers, cuddling close - for warmth obviously - and talking through the night about anything and everything. Those nights Ellie was her most vulnerable were some of Dina’s favorites. Even if the topics they discussed had been tough, she’d always gone home that next morning with difficulty containing her smile, feeling as if she’d chipped away a little more at Ellie’s hard exterior, exposing her own at the same time. It didn’t hurt that those were also the nights Ellie clung to her just a little tighter.

She recalled those nights so fondly, then soured quickly at the thought of how they’d just suddenly stopped altogether after Cat. How, ever since, Ellie cut her time a little shorter with Dina, especially when Jesse was lingering around. How she had looked so worn down this past year or so in particular, and how she and Joel grew further and further apart. Even her eyes had dimmed, the times she really got to look into them anyway. Ellie walked around with her eyes glued to the ground most of the time.

**_That it's not enough to run that dog out of this town_ **

**_My weapon's cold in the backseat_ **

**_Hunt that monster down_ **

**_I wanna be the one who kills the man who hurt you, darling_ **

Her brain abruptly switched topics, flashing a reminder that the annual town dance was coming up. Tapping her foot along to the song running in her ears, she envisioned herself swaying in the old church surrounded by her neighbors. She pictured them dancing to this song. She pictured Seth dancing to this song. _Ha, the bigot unknowingly dancing to a queer song._

**_I wanna be the one who kills the man who hurt you, darling_ **

**_I wanna be the one who kills the man who hurt you, darling_ **

**_I wanna be the one who kills the man_ **

Ellie was there again, she always popped into her head if Dina was honest. She stands in front of Dina, their eyes locking. Dina reaches out and links her arms around Ellie’s neck, while Ellie snakes hers around Dina’s waist and smiles. Her smile is so warm, and it’s such a rare thing to see, it feels like a small victory every time Dina catches one. 

It all felt so real.

They move closer and closer together as the distorted guitars swell, their foreheads connecting. Dina imagined herself tilting her head up slowly, their noses brushing as she stared longingly at Ellie’s lips, lining them up with her own -

**_Just because I feel the devil in your bed don't mean it's…_ **

The singer’s voice came back in jolting her, cutting off the dream sequence. And then the song was over. Dina blinked her eyes open and stared up at the ceiling. Her ears filled with static noise and she realized her entire body was trembling.

_Well, shit._

Three nights later, she stands in front of Ellie’s garage. After listening to the song more times than she’d have liked to admit, Dina had wrapped the CD in some old newspaper, the ink dyeing her sweaty palms. She takes a deep breath, knocks twice and waits for Ellie to open. When she does, she looks surprised.

“Dina, hey. What, what’s up?”

“Hey, El. Happy birthday!” She pauses, but Ellie doesn’t react. “Sorry, is this a bad time?”

Ellie blinks rapidly, coming to. _Why is she acting so fucking weird?_ “No, no, not at all. Thanks. Uh, wanna come in?” She rubs at the back of her neck nervously.

Dina pretends not to notice, but the little movement stirs excitement in her nonetheless. “Yes, please! It’s cold, hah.”

Ellie ushers Dina through the door, closes it behind her and immediately jams her hands into her pockets. They look at each other for a beat, and then Dina can’t take it anymore and starts talking.

“So, what’s up, how’s your day been? Sorry I couldn’t come by sooner, I had patrol pretty early.”

“No worries. Um, good. Maria gave me the day off. Though, I didn’t do much so kinda wish she hadn’t.”

“Didn’t hang out with Joel or anybody?”

Ellie’s eyes flit out her window towards Joel’s house, then down to the floor. “Nah. Um, he asked if I wanted to have dinner, but I told him I didn’t really feel like company.”

“Oh! Oh, well if you wanna be alone, I can - “

“No! Um, you came all this way - “

“Ellie, I literally live like four houses down, it’s not that far of a walk - “

“Dina.”

“- back...Yeah?”

Dina had been stepping around Ellie to reach for the door when Ellie threw her hand out and brushed the underside of Dina’s wrist to stop her. They were very close all of a sudden, Ellie’s fingers lightly dusting over her skin.

Ellie inhaled sharply through her nose before forcing the air out of her mouth, her eyes trailing off the ground to look up at Dina. “Will you...will you stay? For a bit?”

Dina’s eyes had watched Ellie’s lips as she spoke, which may have done _things_. Biting the inside of her cheek, she ducks her head, feeling the heat rise up her neck. Dina takes a step back, moving more into the room.

“Of course.”

After the shaky start, they had found their spots on the couch and spent the next hour just talking, effortlessly. Dina wasn’t surprised though. No matter how much time they spent apart, they could always find their rhythm.

So of course, Dina promptly threw a wrench in that.

“Are you gonna go to the dance?” Dina blurted. The air shifted slightly as Ellie worked to catch up to the change.

“I mean, I hadn’t planned on it.” She stops, her eyes now on her hands, playing with her fingers nervously. “Why? Need a wingman for Jesse?”

_Fuck. Why Ellie, why._

“Definitely not.” Dina suddenly felt angry. _She’s so oblivious. Okay, that’s not completely fair, I was oblivious too like, 72 hours ago._ “I’m gonna pretend you didn’t just say that when I’m trying to - listen, Jesse and me, that’s over, okay?”

“Okay. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to - “

“No, it’s fine. I get it. History repeats - has repeated - itself numerous times and all that. But, it’s done. Anyway. Ah fuck, why is this so hard...” Dina balls her fists in frustration with herself.

“Are you okay? What did I just mess up?”

“Haaa. Nothing, well maybe, I don’t know.” Then Dina mumbled out loud, but mostly to herself, “We’re just gonna push through.” She took a deep breath, which didn’t end up helping as more word vomit tumbled out. “I want you to go. With me. Or meet me! Just, uh god, if I’m gonna go to this fucking dance I want you there okay?”

Ellie choked out a short laugh. “Yeah. Okay, yeah, you got it.”

“Okay. Good.” Dina shook her head, laughing as she looked back up and into Ellie’s eyes. She smiles at Ellie, who tries but fails to contain the grin spreading across her face.

After a moment, Dina remembered why she came in the first place. “Oh! I have a gift for you.”

“No way, Dina, you totally didn’t need to do that.”

“Well I know I didn’t _need_ to, I wanted to.” She shook the gift out of her coat pocket and placed it into Ellie’s lap. Ellie had turned in towards her a little more as she received the gift, and now their knees grazed each other’s. Dina gulped. “Here you go. Happy birthday, El.”

Ellie started delicately opening the newspaper wrapping, which made Dina roll her eyes. “It’s just newspaper, dude. Rip that shit!” She was so anxious, she tucked her hands into her jacket so Ellie couldn’t see them shaking.

When Ellie saw the CD, she smirked. “Killer? I hardly know her!”

“Oh god, you idiot.” They both laughed.

“What’s a Palehound, by the way?”

“I have no clue, hah. I liked the photo. Also, um, it’s a gay musician.”

Ellie‘s jaw dropped, mocking offended. “What are you trying to say? You think I’m gay, Dina?”

Dina huffed, smacking at Ellie’s arm. “Not something anyone really needs to _think_ about when they see you, doofus.” Ellie laughed, and Dina continued seriously. “No no, I just thought. Maybe you’d like to hear some music written by people like usss _-you_. People like you.”

Ellie paused and looked up at Dina at that slip. Something like hope passed over her face and then it was gone. “Hm. Well, you’re not wrong, I guess. This is really cool. Thank you so much, D. I can’t wait to listen to it.” She stopped and rubbed at her chin. “Did - did you wanna listen with me now?”

She did, she did want to so badly. But also, if she listened to the song with Ellie and it evoked the emotion it had when she listened alone, she didn’t know what would happen. And she wasn’t sure she could handle finding out tonight.

Plus, maybe it’d be obvious she already listened to it on her own if she reacted to it at all. So instead, she decided just one more night, she would do what she’d apparently been doing all the years she’d known Ellie. She would run.

“Nah, nah it’s cool. You’ll let me know? I should probably go anyhow, it’s getting late.”

Ellie’s face twitched briefly, then went neutral once again. Masterful work by the useless lesbian. “Oh, yeah. Okay. Well.”

“Yeah, um, sorry. I just noticed how tired I am. Um. Happy birthday again, for the 100th time.”

Ellie smirked. “Thanks. I’m really glad you came over.” Quietly, she added, “I - I missed you.”

Dina’s heart exploded. “I missed you too.”

She stood then and Ellie quickly rose to follow her. They walked towards the door and before Dina reached for the handle, she turned back towards Ellie. Without thinking too hard on it, she threw her arms around the other girl. Ellie returned the hug with very little hesitation, which felt good to Dina. So good in fact, the hug lasted longer than it probably should have, but neither of them thought to point it out.

Just as they began to come apart, Dina stopped and held Ellie at arms length, staring right up and into her eyes again. _She hasn’t looked me in the eyes like this in a really long time._

“So, if I don’t see much of you before, you promise, you’ll come to the dance?”

Ellie held Dina’s gaze, unwavering, and nodded her head slowly. Her eyes lowered to Dina’s lips then back up again, so swiftly Dina might have imagined it. Either way, it caused her stomach to drop into her feet. One too many of her organs had been incinerated in less than a few minutes, what was this witchcraft? _Holy hell, abort! Abort._

She cleared her throat as she nodded quickly and detached herself from Ellie, reaching blindly for the door handle behind her back. “Awesome. Okay well, night, El.”

“Goodnight, Dina. Thanks again. I’m gonna listen to it right now.”

“Cool.”

As Dina walked into the street, she looked back to see Ellie staring after her from the doorway, her hand held up in an awkward wave. Dina made a peace sign in response, then groaned at herself as she spun back around and picked up the pace, her body beginning to tremble once again. She knew it had nothing to do with the cold.

  
When she got home, Dina couldn’t stop thinking about how she’d asked Ellie to the dance. She’d actually done that! She inhaled sharply and blew out a long breath she didn’t know she’d been holding in her chest. She started laughing like an absolute idiot and danced up the stairs to her room.

Laying in bed that night, the song running through her, she wondered if Ellie had listened yet. Maybe she was listening right now, and maybe she would feel what Dina had felt hearing it, too.

She closed her eyes, falling asleep to the chorus looping in her mind, well one half of it anyway.

_I wanna be the one..._


End file.
